Early on in our relationship, I discovered that Philip liked riding in the car.  That was a real gift, since not all parrots do.  Some even get car sick.  Not Philip.  He would chatter and look out the window and play with his toys.  One time I felt little splashes of water coming from behind me.  I turned around and he was all fluffed up and flicking water everywhere like he was taking a bath … in my back seat. 

So, when it came time to move, I had a couple of options for getting Philip to South Carolina.  One was to ship my car and fly with Philip.  This method had a lot of complications, but it greatly reduced the transit time.  Another option was to make the cross country trek.  This was cheaper and more convenient, but could also prolong the stress factor for both of us.  Especially if Philip got on one of his noisy binges.  Nothing like being stuck in a tin can with jungle bird.

In the end, I opted for the cross country drive, and I think that was the right choice.  Philip did amazingly well.  I filled his travel cage with toys and arranged a blanket so that I could easily pull it over the top if needed.  I only had to do that a few times, which is pretty good for three straight days on the road.  It may also have been because I threatened to make him walk if he got too loud for too long.  He mostly played and munched on his treats.  He got a full two hours of play time out of a granola bar wrapper that he crinkled and crinkled with childlike delight.    

We arrived at my new home in South Carolina in one piece.  Pretty awesome for a parrot to endure that kind of transition without a significant change in eating or playing habits.  I was intentional about making sure there were familiar anchor points in the midst of the change and I am sure that helped. Anyway, he seemed to settle in pretty well, especially after I moved his big cage into the office.  He so loves that room. 

We got past the first few months of moving stress and turmoil, but I was struggling.  The change in Philip’s behavior that began in California was magnified by the fact that we lived in a bigger place now.  The rooms were further apart.  He did not like being left alone for more than a few minutes.  I did not realize that the level of noise would wear on me like it was, nor the constant need for me to be present and synchronize to him. 

This emotional soul searching caused me to take a step back and look at the bigger picture. 

I began to see how much owning an African Grey was a lifestyle.  I think it is especially so when you are single and have no other pets.  Greys are incredibly social.  And the only other living creature that was regularly in Philip’s life was me.  There were no other humans or even animals to absorb some of his need for interaction.  I worked full time, plus I had my own business, and I traveled a lot.    

So, Philip was not getting anywhere near the level of interaction he was made to have.  And when I was at home with him, he wanted my full attention.  Other stress factors that were usually in the background began to push themselves to the front, and I was forced to question whether my life was sustainable in its current condition. 

I say “forced to question” because it was a monumental emotional battle.  Some people say that having a parrot is the closest thing to having children.  A lot of parrot lovers called their birds “fids” for “feathered kids”.  Parrots burrow deep into your heart, and I daresay I took it even deeper with Philip by working so hard to develop his trust.  He unlocked a nurturing, protective love in me that I had never experienced before.  Even thinking in this direction unleashed a torrent of “what ifs” that would put a lifelong worry wart to shame. 

Yet, the reality of everyday life clearly indicated that all was not well.  Philip was not getting the level of interaction he should have.  I was getting more and more stressed and impatient with him.  Something about the situation needed to change. 

What was I going to do?